Wedding Planning Quandry

This question came into my inbox yesterday and it's a question that comes up often in wedding planning. So I thought I would share it with you, dear reader, then share my answer.

Dear Katasha
Is it of proper bridal etiquette to provide food for the live band and or DJ? Does it depend on the time length of requested service? Is this something that is negotiated in their rate? How is this usually discussed? Is this part of the "breaks" in their contract? Where would they eat? If another [place] setting needs to be arranged and you're limited on space, how would you handle?
T.J.

Hi T.J.
Those are some great questions! I'm glad you asked. This scenario comes up more often than not during the planning of a wedding. It is very appropriate (and in my opinion, almost necessary) to provide food for the musicians at your wedding reception. The musicians are working very hard for you and are the linchpin in your quest to have a fun, dance-all-night wedding reception. Do you remember how you feel when you haven't eaten in quite a while? Would you want someone who feels that way playing live music for your wedding?? It is essentially common courtesy to feed all of the vendors who are on hand, working at your wedding. This would include the photographer(s), the wedding planner and assistants, the videographer(s) and the musicians.

Now--if you're serving sea bass and petit filet, don't feel that you have to serve this costly meal to your vendors. It could be something as simple as a boxed lunch and a drink. The vendors do not have to sit in the main dining area, if space doesn't allow. Many times, there is an ante-room where the vendors will sit and eat while the guests are eating. Musicians will eat during this "break" and you should make sure they have back-up music playing--either a CD or a solo musician. Generally, this is discussed when contracting with the musicians and it should not affect their rate. I'm saying--don't ask for a discount because you are going to feed them. Provisions for meals is in my contract for me and my assistants, but all wedding vendors may not have it in theirs. However, whether it's in the contract or not, I think it's the right thing to do.

Yours In Exquisite Weddings,
Katasha

Do you have any wedding quandries that you have been dying to ask about? I would love to help you out. Please email any questions to info{at}ksherrieandcompany{dot}com and I'll be sure to steer you in the right direction.
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